


Red Like Fire

by crookedsmile



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-19
Updated: 2016-02-19
Packaged: 2018-05-21 15:20:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6056506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crookedsmile/pseuds/crookedsmile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Garrus Vakarian is not a xenophile. Soft and squishy is not his thing, never has been.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Red Like Fire

He first sees her in the Citadel Tower. Executor Pallin is chewing him out again. (Unbeknownst to him, it will be the last time.) Saren is dirty; he knows Saren is dirty. Just like Dr Heart. No one will listen to him. Just like Dr Heart. Pallin tells him to give up, follow procedure, and try harder on the next case. It is a familiar tirade, one he has heard a million times since his youth. Sometimes he wonders if he is the only one in the galaxy who understands that there is a difference between law and justice. Pallin walks away.

She strides up to him and nods, but even he can tell her face is cold. Later, in Dr Michel's clinic, he makes a tricky headshot on some garbage merc, and she nods again. This time her face is warm. She's impressed.

He's always been proud of his headshots.

*

Her entire crew is insubordinate, it seems. They obey orders in the field, fine. But in their downtime, they play cards in the mess, while Shepard works in her cabin. The men -- and most of them are men, though he can't imagine why; their women work harder, work smarter, from what he's seen -- snicker and leer about their CO when she can't hear. Talk about her ruby-red lips and what they could do if wrapped around their cocks. Sometimes humans make up lies to disgust or confuse him, he's learned, because that amuses them. He is sure this is one of them, but the image sticks stubbornly in his mind anyway.

Many of these men will be dead by the end of the mission. A part of him will be glad for it, and the rest of him will be ashamed for feeling that way.

*

He sits in the Mako. It is the only place he can be alone. Unlike his days in basic, the bunks here are not private. The Alliance has a strict no-fraternization policy, so nobody is meant to have any need for privacy. It is insane, he thinks. He spreads his legs and plants his feet firmly on the opposite wall, then unbuckles the seals of his armor at the groin. (That is all he needs.)

He wraps his tongue around the base of his cock, twisting it up and down his length. His eyes are closed. He imagines a woman: a proper turian woman, a beautiful woman. Bone-white plates and bright blue markings, a woman from home. She spreads her legs for him.

He does not imagine a woman with green eyes and a red fringe, too-soft pink chest with its constellation of copper-red stars spattered across. He is not a xenophile. Her waist is too thick, her fringe too long, too flexible and everything about her is just far too _soft_. Everything except the force of her fist in the face of a wayward merc, and the pierce of her gaze when she asks him if he's willing to fight.

He comes, muffling his groans in the corner of his elbow. He sops up the mess with a rag, but Wrex still gives him a broad smirk when he leaves. He glares back. It's none of his fucking business.

*

He tells her about Dr Heart. C-SEC didn't care, the turian military didn't care. She cared. When he tracks down his ship, she takes the necessary detour, and watches impassively as he guns the doctor down. It feels good, damned good.

And it's not just about the vengeance. For the first time in his life, _he is right_. Someone believes in him, and it's addictive. He knows, now. He'll follow her into hell and back. No complaints, no question. He is hers. Professionally. Of course. She has his loyalty, that's all.

He can't help but notice that she takes him on every mission afterwards. Because her own men are insubordinate, he tells himself.

*

He gets the kill-shot on Saren. They've worked together nearly a year, and she's shown no signs of needing him to prove himself further, but he does his best regardless. When Saren is downed, he starts to crow, then looks around for her. He sees a pile of rock and debris smothering her. Her body is soft, so soft, and he is afraid for her, but her armor holds up. He pulls her from the rubble. She recovers. He enrolls in Spectre training, with her as a reference. He doesn't want to be her subordinate anymore. He wants to be her equal.

Within the year, she is dead. He doesn't attend her funeral. In his mind, she lives, and vibrantly. He drops out of training and takes the first ship he can find to Omega. He'll clean this place; he'll fix it. In his mind, when he makes a kill-shot, he can hear her laughing, spitting out one of her trademark one-liners.

In his mind, she lives, and it's enough to keep him going.


End file.
